Sunday, September 02, 2007

helpless

well, been thru lots of ups and downs lately regarding my graduate studies.

First i got the courses.
But no money
Then there was the scholarship
next the dean wants me to change course
laters the funding from kementerian (KPT) for my host campus has reached its quota this year
Coz my host campus award more places than the budget allocated
afterwards i heard that kementerian would preferably award PhD candidates
but my dean asked me to apply for masters
suddenly the dean got transfer (hence he can't fight for my case)
then i got an offer from a uni in Oz
we thought perhaps it's cheaper
it cost AUD 13+ k per sem for tuition fees alone
unexpectedly my dad just got news that he was accepted to china to study for a year or two
so the burden is on mom now (not sure if i like seeing her suffer)
hence i am Stuck here. sob sobs.

Worst thing is I am also quite lost about what I really want for my career. "Life is difficult" anounced by Scott Peck in the first line and first chapter of the Road less Traveled. His solution was for us to accept this truth. Because once we agree with it we will moan less about our problems as if life ought to be easy.

6 comments:

Jesus Freak said...
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Jesus Freak said...

hey buddy, i know how you feel. yes, life is indeed difficult. i'm sure the Lord will grant you your desires to continue your education. just be still and know that He is faithful...

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Jeremiah 29:11

el'z said...

heys,

thx for yr encouragements! will try to recite that verse again whenever i feel in need of something to hold on to.

Sue said...

another verse for u dearie:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding, but in all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your path :)

Rachel Chew said...

He's sovereign and when all seems too confusing, He's the only Truth you can hang on to. i hope in the mess of things you'd find His hand working :)

el'z said...

sue & cat : thx for pointing my experience back to the cross. appreciate your kind words :)